How disappointing.....
I may have had my hopes too high, but I feel so ripped off this Christmas. Presents aren't usually that big a deal to me or anything because I know I'm hard to shop for. Even so, I was influenced by commercials and my expectations my have gotten all out of whack. I was so excited that I bolted out of bed and ran to the garage to see if there was a Jaguar waiting there....but nothing. Then I opened all the little boxes to see if any car keys were in there.....again, nothing. Finally I opened the bigger boxes, hoping that there would be a remote control Lexus in one that would lead me to the real one outside with the big bow on it....but it wasn't to be. What the hell?!....from the commercials it seemed like everyone was getting a car this Christmas! They were even showing non-white people getting them! That really sucks....now I feel dumb that ordered those "XMASLXUS" vanity plates already. I should've known it was all just a scam....my friend who works at a Lexus dealership says they don't even stock huge Christmas bows to put on cars.......
posted by Number at 12:54 PM [edit]
Be afraid...be very afraid.....
Sometimes the scariest things are the one's that kinda sneak up on you. When something flies below the radar, by the time you realize what's going on it may already be too late. I bring this up because I think I've figured out a plot against the people of America and everyone needs to know about it. I know that some people may think I'm over-reacting, but I really think that I am on to something. So what is it that is making so nervous?.....it's these new body sprays I've been seeing commercials for. For any of you who aren't familiar with the concept, I'll try to explain it. From what I understand, you spray this stuff on all over your body to kinda freshen yourself up. The commercials I've seen are pretty gross....the guys open up their shirts and spray the crap all over themselves. Now you may think that there's nothing dangerous about a product simply because it's cheesy, and that was my initial reaction too, but then I started asking myself some questions. I wondered "what kind of idiot would use that stuff?", and "how is that different from the guys who drown themselves in cologne?".....then I realized that there really isn't a difference between the body spray and drowning in cologne, and I made the connection which led to this horrifying thought: Someone is trying to introduce the European shower to America!!!!! I haven't really investigated, but I'm betting that the makers of these body sprays are subsidiaries of French companies. I must spread the word and get the citizens of this great country to act before it's too late. Everyone should keep their eyes open, or maybe I should say noses. If you suspect someone of being a victim of these heinous products you should proceed with caution....it may turn out that the person is actually really French.......
posted by Number at 10:37 PM [edit] 
